This is a letter to you. A message to a mother, from a mother.
Who better to write a message to a mother, then someone who’s right there in the trenches with you? I know what it is to love so much, and at the same time not want any human beings around me.
I know what it is to get angry and feel crushing guilt.
I know what it’s like to wake up resolved to be a more patient mom, then hours later be at the end of my rope.
I know what it’s like to look forward to bed time, only to lie awake thinking of what you could have done differently.
I know what it’s like for the to-do list to keep stretching, while you wear thin.
When you think of taking on the role of mother… what comes to mind? Do you berate yourself for doing a bad job? Do you feel sadness over lost moments?
Maybe you feel like I sometimes do… spent, worn, empty… yet filled to the brim with impossible love at the very same time.
I’ll tell you the truth. I’ve had moments where I’ve sat on the bathroom floor crying exhausted, secret tears into the toilet bowl while scrubbing it. I’ve had moments like that where I’m completely done… yet since there’s still toilets to clean… I clean the toilets.
I’ve watched my kids while they slept, and played back moments from the day that I wished I could change.
While they’ve slept, I’ve hovered over them in prayer, begging God to watch over them. In that same prayer, I’d beg him to reveal how to be a more patient mother… to soften my heart.
Have your kids ever said, “Mommy” a million times a day? Mine too. Have they ever said it one too many times, and with exasperation, you ask them what they want now… only to have them go on to be so stinkin’ sweet that it completely shatters your jaded, grown-up heart? Yea, me too.
You see, I get it. I know. That’s why I’m writing a message to a mother. Because I know you need it. I know that you need to be understood. Seen. Prayed for.
Because I do, too.
A Message to a Mother – How motherhood changes you
Becoming a mother changed my life. It changes everyone’s lives.
In my case, I say thank goodness. I sure thought I had things together before I had kids. And wow, did God humble me as soon as that first little one came on the scene.
Motherhood has a way of pointing out our flaws, our pride, and our weaknesses. In my case, what I now know was weakness, I used to think was strength.
You see, before I had kids, I was building my own kingdom. I didn’t see it at the time, but I had everything so “under control” that I had no need for God. Or so I thought.
God knew better. He knew that “my” world was beyond my control. He knew that I needed to be reminded of why I’m even here on earth… to bring HIM glory.
Back then, I really needed to read this… a message to a mother.
Having kids… those exhausting, beautiful, mischievous, sweet, trouble-making, little angels… was exactly what God needed to give me to remind me that HIS power is made perfect in MY weakness (2nd Cor. 12:9).
Kids are what I needed to remind me that this is a mission field, and we are not here to build our own kingdoms. We are here to be a part of building HIS kingdom.
So, What is Motherhood, Really?
Motherhood is an honor. It is a challenge, and it is a gift. Motherhood is a refining fire.
Your children don’t see you as a crazy, impatient, exhausted mess… they see you as the person they love most in the world. It’s true. I dare you to look deep into the sweet eyes of your children and see how they sparkle a certain way just for you.
God chose YOU to be the mother of your children. He knew that you were just the warrior required to raise those arrows (Psalm 127:4).
Through motherhood, you are an incredible part of the body of Christ at work.
Right now, it might feel like all you’re doing is making snacks, stopping fights and wiping butts. But girl… those kids are going to be world changers.
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YOU are the one that is blessed to guide them. To calm them down when they’re upset.
You’re the one that gets to teach them how to cope when life is… well, life.
You get to be the one to shine a light on their strengths and gifts, and encourage them to step out even when they’re afraid.
When they have a nightmare, it’s you who God has trusted to comfort them.
It’s you who will hold their hand when they cross the street, and wipe their tears when their hearts break.
It’s you that they’ll want to call one day with good news.
It’s you they’ll run to for advice.
You are their safe place. You are home.
Most of all, you get to point them to their true identity.
You get to show them their worth and identity is not based on their grades, their looks, their social media followers or the “caliber” of their job. You get to be the one to teach them that their true identity comes from the Father, and that they are made in the image of the King of the world.
You are blessed to be a mother.
Be a Mother With Purpose.
So, yes. Motherhood is exhausting. I’m right here with you. Sometimes the days are so long, and the nights are way too short.
But remember… just like the identity of your children comes from the Father, so does yours. You are a mother, but that’s not the whole of who you are. You are a daughter of the King. You are blessed, mama.
He has equipped you to do every good work (2nd Tim 3:17)… even the work that never ends (being a mother). He has deemed you worthy to raise the kids that He loves even more than you do. He knows that the same spirit that lives in you as a Christian mother is the same spirit that raised Christ from the dead (Romans 8:11).
Being a Mother- A Message to a Mother
Through His power, you can do hard things.
So be a mother who shows up with intention. Be a mother who walks boldly in her purpose.
Be a mother who, even when she fails, is humble enough to admit it, seek forgiveness, and move on. Don’t dwell on what you can’t change, but look forward to what you can do.
You are a warrior and you are raising arrows. The warrior that you are is strong, yet tender, firm, yet understanding, and always faithful.
Being a mother means you live with the knowledge that you have been entrusted to a sacred job. A high, and holy calling. Hold it with reverence, nurture it, and stay the course.
This is my message to a mother… my message to you.
God bless, mama. You got this.
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